Am partially glad that finally we are getting more pregnancy news on celebrities who don't induce nausea if I ever see them on gossip magazine covers.
First up - the very lovely Brooke Shield, whom I've heard battled for years to have a baby. She left Andre Agassi, then moved on to a new hubby, finally got pregnant, and then suffered post-natal depression. Well done Brooke on getting pregnant, naturally or not, at 40. Fuck yeah.
Then it was Aussie actress Claudia Karvan. I used to love her to bits because she is such a humble person and incredible actress. I am however a little jealous that she managed to have her acting career down-pat and be a mother at the same time. Damn lucky.
The third piece of pregnancy news is a novelty one. Because she is a bit of a novelty herself. It is Geri Halliwell - a.k.a. Ginger Spice. She struggled with her weight and singing career for years, probably drugged out of her head when she was involved with a string of boy band singers, became a yoga-zen-like spoke person promoting yoga and her fine figure, became an alcoholic/addicted to painkillers and at the same time secretly bulumic. Finally she is at ease with her natural weight, suffered shitty singing career, and fell pregnant. What more can you ask for? She bedded Robbie Williams and now have a baby (two events unrelated).
Sigh...well good for these women. Really. I really am happy for them.
I wrote a long blog about my thoughts on adoption yesterday. Something about wanting to end this IVF misery and be happy. And would like to explore the adoption option. Then, as art imitating life, I put that blog on-hold and saved it as draft.
Today I feel different. I watched a real life caesarean delivery on TV last night - the cutting of flesh and the sight of blood did not gross me out at all - in fact I was totally intrigued and the next thing you know I was crying - it was as if I was the one giving birth to the baby. I saw the baby emerged from her mother's uterus and it was the most amazing thing I have ever seen. The baby girl came out all agitated and shocked, and started to cry for her life.
The crying was the sweetest thing I have ever heard.
I then looked over to where Apeman was sitting, he was watching it too and I saw tears in his eyes.
This infertility journey, at times downright shitty and unforgiving, is definitely worth fighting for.