So last night, whilst watching TV with Apeman, I ducked off during a commercial break to wee.
I wiped - and saw specks of bright red blood coming off with my cervical mucous. I wiped again, and again, and again, and it kept coming off. It wasn't much, just specks of blood, but bright red, and any bleeding is a freakout. And I am the queen of all freakouts.
Me: `So what do we do?'
Apeman: `It is probably nothing.'
Me: `So what happens if it is something? You are not supposed to see blood at 19 weeks?'
So, just on the safe side, Apeman took me to the hospital for a check up.
Thankfully the staff at the hospital were really helpful and calming. They checked to see if I have any cramping (no), weakness (no), or if I am bleeding clots (no). I was laid out on the examination table and a midwife used the doppler sound machine thing on me. We couldn't hear a heart beat. But we could hear the placenta pumping away.
`The sound of the placenta pumping blood is a good sign - it means there should be a heartbeat in there somewhere.' But she tried again and again and we could not hear the heart beat.
The doctor came in later and gave me an ultrasound. It took her two seconds to get a full picture of my little poopie. He/she was playing with his/her face, waving the arms about, and then all of sudden, decided to `moon' us all and did a 180 degree body flip. I can also faintly see the wriggling of fingers. We cannot see much else, but that was reassuring enough for us.
Thank you God for giving me this moment. I am so, so grateful.