Was packing for our trip last night, and came across a stash of condoms. These condoms are a real collector's item - they are at least 7 years old and pretty much dried up. Everytime we moved houses Apeman must have `saved' them - thinking we may need to use it one day. (Eeek!)
Then suddenly a thought crossed my mind.
`Did you know that I am a walking human contraceptive?'
`What you mean?'
`Well we have been having sex for 9 years now, and 6 of them are unprotected, and they keep putting healthy embryos into me and I am still not pregnant, so aren't I qualified enough for that name?'
I just found out the sad (happy?) news that a fresh graduate in this office who is only half year out of university got knocked up, and since she is well into her three months worth she is therefore keeping the baby - and the catch is the relationship was casual (some heard it was a one-night stand because there was never a boyfriend mentioned). Workmates here are saying isn't it weird that you survived high school and university, with all those drunken keg parties and hormonally charged uni students - she managed to get by okay, but she got knocked up only months into her first job and was supposed to be going on an offshore trip soon?
I don't envy her - but of course I feel shitty about it. People are getting knocked up by having one night stands around me, whilst we have steady sex for years and years and I am still Libra Fluer's biggest customer. Fuck that's really messed up.