Why so hard?

There must be some sort of statistics out there about what sort of percentage of women out there experience infertiltiy. What is it? 20%? 30%? They say for a healthy woman - there is a 25% chance for her to fall pregnant every month.

I live in hope that this is the case - and that my past 5 transfers were duds because of statistics. That's what my doctor told me as well. I have a nice healthy womb - only my ovary (now gone) is dodgy. So realistically and optimistically - I should get pregnant no problem right?

I am one of those lucky blessed ones (BLESSED?) who although is plagued with this bastard of an illness called Endometriosis, I am only affected by it on one side - which means my other ovary is good and free from disease. So after some encouragement from my doctor - I went under the knife in March this year and had the ovary taken out. It was painful - and I wanted to cry but couldn't because the 3 inch surgery opening just below my bikini line will pull and it will hurt even more. It has been three months since my surgery - so far so good. I told my doctor even though he can't get me pregnant at least he is an ace at surgery.

Right now - I am waiting for attempt numero six. I am going for gold. I am using Progynova to bring on a simulated cycle so I know exactly when the embryo transfer is. Like my previous attempt, I am going to adopt the `no frills' approach.

Now what is the `no frills' approach?

Well, I started off full of hope - keep thinking `Oh this is it - let's start thinking of names and prepare for our baby'. Of course that didn't work out. Then I used the `let's be more careful approach', and laid on my back throughout the entire 2 week wait. Of course that didn't work out either. That was with two embryos transferred as well and a bonk during ovulation. Then I went on to try the `I am going back to work and carry on normal' approach. That almost worked, I was pregnant for a few days - but it was not a viable pregnancy and the baby implanted abnormally. Then I returned to the `be more careful' approach for the fourth time - that didn't work. The fifth time it was `carry on as normal', I did housework, went shopping, pushed reasonably hard at the throne and everything.

This time I am going to be the same.

Hell - how do you think women during the war days get pregnant? Of course they don't have the luxury of laying on the back for weeks, plus they have to worry about flying missles or ninjas breaking into their house .... so yeah. No frills approach this time.